I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Randomize
