The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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