i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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