i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
