omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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