alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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