I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
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