HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Randomize
