Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize