TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
