Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
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