You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
