I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
