I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
