you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
