I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
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