it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
