so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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