i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
