I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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