And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
