Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize
