nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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