That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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