Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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