He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms