I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
try lime green
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.