so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Randomize