I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Randomize
