I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
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