Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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