Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
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