He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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