There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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