Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
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