Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Randomize