We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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