Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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