you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
