Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
My ass is underappreciated
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
