been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
