Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Randomize
