Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
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