ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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