'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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