And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
