I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Randomize