I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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