Where did you get a picture of my penis
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
