Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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