i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
time to smoke my breakfast
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
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