I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize